Earworm
by phoebenpiper
Summary: Jess gets a song stuck in her head and accidentally starts singing it...directly into Becker's ear.


Earworm

a Primeval fanfic by phoebenpiper

...

[Note: this is vaguely set sometime during seasons 4 and/or 5.]

...

Jess loved going music shopping in her own CD collection. Just last week she'd rediscovered a CD that had gone missing under her car seat literally years ago. Listening to it now, she realised it was absolutely filled with "Becker" songs. There was one in particular that she just might've listened to on infinite repeat on the entire drive home last night as she daydreamed about the handsome soldier. So in reality, she had no one but herself to blame for the earworm.

The song had been running through her head all day, and she couldn't get rid of it no matter what she did. She'd tried replacing it with another song - Connor had suggested singing "It's a Small World", and while it hadn't worked for her, she'd heard Connor whistling the Disney song hours later and felt a bit guilty that now he had an earworm as well.

On her lunch break she'd gone out to her car so she could listen to the entire song straight through - in the past that had sometimes dislodged her earworms. It hadn't worked in this instance, but the trip hadn't all been for naught - it'd given her the chance to look up the lyrics on the CD insert to one line that she just didn't understand (because she was fairly certain "I wanna belight candle, Ali" was not correct).

Jess even tried looking up suggestions on the internet on how to rid herself of the pesky song. One site suggested envisioning the earworm as a physical creature crawling out of your ear and then stomping on it, but Jess found this idea just too disturbing to even consider!

Her only consolation was that she had the ENTIRE song stuck in her head and not just a single line, so at least it only repeated every two and a half minutes. She was reminding herself of this fact, though not feeling particularly consoled, as the ending synthesizers faded out and the opening electrical guitars started up once again in her head, which is why she didn't hear Becker approach the hub.

"Hey."

Jess practically jumped out of her skin. "Becker! I didn't hear you."

He nodded, one eyebrow raised in what appeared to be amusement. "Must be hard to hear over the humming."

"Humming?"

Becker's face broke out into a full-fledged smile. "You didn't know? You've been mindlessly humming all day."

Jess's face started to feel warm. "Sorry. I had no idea. I've had this stupid earworm since this morning, and I simply can't get rid of it."

Becker nodded. "That explains the bopping."

Jess's face turned redder. "I was bopping?"

Becker nodded again, seemingly enjoying her discomfort. "I believe the phrase is 'chair dancing'."

Jess groaned and covered her face - could this get anymore embarrassing?

"So what's the song?"

Apparently it could. Jess gulped uncomfortably and turned back to the ADD as if she'd noticed something important on one of the monitors, no longer able to look Becker in the eye. She guessed he probably didn't know the song, but what if he did? She worried that he'd somehow know that she'd been thinking about him as the words ran through her head, and then she would simply die of embarrassment!

"Oh...um...I don't think you know it."

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Becker raise a questioning eyebrow, but she refused to acknowledge it, instead zooming in on one of the maps, hoping to appear too engrossed in her work to have heard his question.

It must've worked, for Becker shrugged and wandered off. Once he was gone, she breathed a sigh of relief, feeling like she'd somehow dodged a bullet...am extremely soul-baring, mortifying bullet!

...

The anomaly had occurred just at the shift change, and Becker had simply grabbed a few of his men (plus Ardley) and headed up towards Ipswich, hoping there'd be no incursion in the two hours it took to drive there in the pouring rain. Luckily, the anomaly was in a secluded wood, and the _Protorohippus_ that came through were easy to round up, thanks to them all being huddled together under a tree, trying to keep out of the rain. The team managed to get the three terrier-sized Paleogene horses back through the anomaly with much mollycoddling but little incident. After locking the gateway, they'd done a thorough sweep of the area to ensure that no other creatures had come through before Becker released the rest of the team.

"The incursion's been handled, and I've sent the others back," Becker reported back to Ops. "I need someone sent out to guard the anomaly until it closes - I'll wait here until they arrive."

"Right away, Becker."

The soldier was shocked to hear Jess's voice come through the comms. "Jess? What are you still doing at work? Isn't your shift over?"

"Officially, yes. But Ravi had a family dinner tonight and asked me to cover for a few hours."

Becker sighed in frustration - sometimes Jess was just too nice for her own good. Becker was constantly worried that others would take advantage of her good nature, so he'd made sure his men knew he wouldn't tolerate such behaviour. Apparently he needed to have that same talk with Ravi as well.

"Furbank's on her way out to you," Jess reported, obviously having quickly contacted the soldier and given her the necessary information and coordinates. "She should be there in a couple hours."

"Thanks, Jess." In his heart, Becker knew that if Ravi had been on duty, it would've been another 30 minutes before relief would've been on their way, yet he couldn't help but scold: "And you shouldn't be covering for other people, Jessica - they should deal with their family business on their own time, not on yours." Becker hadn't meant to sound quite so harsh, but he always felt somehow protective of her, even though she seemed perfectly capable of taking care of herself. In fact, she was clearly capable of taking care of the entire ARC team. She was the best field coordinator Becker had ever worked with, which just went to show that you can't judge a book by its cover...or a field coordinator by her ridiculously impractical shoes!

"Oh, I don't mind," Jess said. "In fact, it's quite nice here tonight - everyone in Ops has gone home, so I'm all alone and thus catching up on my _Home and Away_. You won't tell Lester on me, will you?"

Becker rolled his eyes. He'd already given her enough grief about her silly Australian soap opera, so he decided to let off on his teasing tonight. "Enjoy," he said as he sat back in his truck, listening to the rain pour down as he watched the locked anomaly.

After twenty interminable minutes of watching nothing, he began to wonder if even _Home and Away_ might be preferable to this boredom. He was about to say something, thinking a friendly chat with Jess might be just what he needed to pass the time, when he heard an additional noise over the pitter-patter of rain on the roof.

Jess was humming again, this time into the comms, which meant it was going straight into Becker's ear. He smiled as he recognised the tune as the one she'd been humming earlier - clearly her earworm was still playing over and over in her head.

Not that he really minded. At least she could hum on pitch, unlike the women in his family, who were all completely tone-deaf. But he was intrigued as to what song it was. When he'd asked her about it, she'd almost imploded from embarrassment, making Becker assume the song was by some artist she was ashamed to admit listening to. In fact, knowing Jess, it was probably some stupid teen heartthrob like Justin Bieber or something.

_"Baby, you'll be rockin' my world."_

Becker stifled a laugh as Jess's humming momentarily erupted into full-fledged singing. Yet he was sure she was blissfully unaware, just as she'd been oblivious to her humming. It was cute, and Becker was torn as to whether to tease her about it or simply let her continue. After much internal debate, he decided to remain quiet for now and simply listen for more.

Unfortunately he had to wait quite awhile before the next lyrics slipped out: _"I'm the kid ... so you be the candy store."_

Becker smiled. That definitely sounded like some kind of Justin Bieber nonsense.

_"Damn! I think I'm losing my mind."_

Becker wasn't sure whether he was more shocked at swearing coming from the squeaky clean teen singer or from Jess herself. Perhaps it WASN'T a Justin Bieber song after all, for surely it would've been all over the news about his corrupting influence on 12-year-olds everywhere.

And Becker was quite surprised to discover that he rather liked hearing Jess swear, though he really couldn't say why. But instead of questioning it, he simply waited patiently to hear what else she might sing. Sadly, she'd lapsed into mindless humming again. As time wore on and the humming continued, Becker's boredom started to return, and he was just about to start chatting with her when she finally sang:

_"But you're in luck, boy."_

Definitely NOT Justin Bieber then, because that sort of thing would DEFINITELY have made the news. Becker guessed the singer was likely the female equivalent, though he had no idea who that might be - he hadn't exactly been up on the pre-teen music scene since S Club 7 had been on the charts.

_"I don't want your diamonds, just a necklace of pearls."_

Becker had to stifle another laugh. Clearly someone should've warned this teenybopper popstar that the expression "necklace of pearls" had another, not so pre-teen-safe meaning.

_"Baby ... I've never been so easy."_

Or perhaps not. Becker was slowly starting to catch on that perhaps this WASN'T the latest teen sensation from the Disney channel; this was actually a dirty song.

_"Let me be your bad little girl."_

Yes, this was most definitely a naughty song!

And Jess was singing it to him, without any awareness that she was doing so...and Becker wasn't about to bring this fact to her attention!

Unfortunately, her mindless humming stopped for a moment, disappointing Becker more than he cared to admit.

But she must've simply reached the end of the song for almost immediately she began again:

_"Boy, I wanna get you alone, I wanna cover you in chocolate and turn off the phone."_

Becker gulped and cracked the window of his truck, suddenly feeling the need for some cool, fresh air. While he knew she was unaware of her absent singing, he couldn't help but envision her saying these things to him, and his imagination was starting to get the better of him. A part of him felt guilty that he hadn't warned her of what she was doing sooner, but surely it was too late to mention it now - it'd merely embarrass her and make her feel self-conscious, and the last thing he wanted to do was make her feel bad.

And besides, he kind of wanted to hear more!

She seemed to have gotten to the chorus once again, and this time she couldn't help but sing along:

_"You make me wanna scream ... and throw you to the ground. ... Do it! Do it to me now!"_

Becker coughed from surprise, the image of Justin Bieber now the FURTHEST thing from his mind!

"Are you warm enough, Becker?" Jess asked, her voice sounding concerned through the comms as she reacted to his cough. "You're not getting sick, are you?"

Becker could just kick himself for breaking the spell!

"Um...definitely warm enough," he said, rolling his window the rest of the way down and sticking his head out into the cold evening shower.

...

Jess felt bad that her extra shift was over before Becker returned to the ARC, but she knew she'd see him in the morning. He always made a point of stopping by the hub several times throughout the day - as Chief of Security, he needed to be regularly apprised, though Jess secretly pretended that his frequent visits had more to do with her than security.

Yet the next morning she became so engrossed in running some diagnostics on the ADD that she didn't notice him arrive or even hear him approach, so she jumped when she suddenly felt his hand on the back of her chair.

"Let me guess," he said. "'Funeral of a Good Girl?'"

"What?" Jess asked, concerned as she turned towards him. "A funeral? Did someone die?"

Becker shook his head. "The earworm. By Bif Naked, right?"

Jess grinned as she finally made the connection. "You know the song!" she squealed excitedly.

He nodded. "I do now."

Jess was confused by his answer. "How do you mean?"

The soldier shrugged, his face a sea of calm as per usual. "I googled it when I got home last night."

Jess accepted his answer at first, but slowly realisation dawned. "But how can you google a tune?"

Becker shrugged again and started to walk off before calling over his shoulder, "By the bye, I noticed there's some Cadbury Milk Chocolate Spread in the canteen. Just in case you, you know...need any." And with that he disappeared into the bowels of the ARC.

Jess turned back to the hub, completely baffled by Becker's cryptic comment. After all, why would she need chocolate spread when he kept her well-stocked in Cadbury bars of all flavours (but orange)?

And damn him! She'd finally been rid of the earworm when she woke up this morning, but thanks to his mentioning it, the song started running through her head once again. She bopped her head in time to the rhythm as she mentally heard the first line:

_"Boy, I wanna get you alone, I wanna cover you in chocolate and turn off the phone."_

Jess gasped as Becker's comment finally made sense! Her face flushed as red at her polka-dotted Espadrilles as she realised that she must've been doing more than humming into the comms! And Becker had HEARD her!

She desperately wanted the floor to open up and swallow her, for she simply couldn't believe she'd just said all those things outloud! To HIM, of all people! What must he think of her?

But he hadn't seemed to treat her any differently this morning, she reminded herself, trying to calm down. He'd still been the same practical, friendly, LOVELY Becker. No harm done then, right?

And after all, she HAD been thinking of him as she sang. Maybe one day she'd have the courage to actually tell him exactly how she felt. In the meantime, she could simply enjoy her song.

And perhaps daydream about things she could do with the chocolate spread in the canteen!

...

THE END

[All song lyrics from "Funeral of a Good Girl" by Bif Naked - no copyright infringement intended! Naturally the lyrics are out-of-order for plot reasons! I highly encourage everyone to go buy this song on iTunes!]


End file.
